Tuesday, August 21, 2012

'Til there was you


Twenty-four years. Over half our lives.

Three children. Three houses, three apartments, two interstate moves, a plethora of cats, many and sundry jobs, two separations, one set of divorce papers, nine cars, too few vacations, too many bad decisions, a lifetime of late night discussion and laughs.

Daily I love yous. Sometimes in anger, confusion, ironic, stark contrast to actions.

Our mutual friends tried to introduce us several times. Things got in the way. Then we met on accident - without the intervention of friends. And ------ nothing. He was chatting up blonds in the kitchen. I went for a motorcycle ride with one of his friends.

Timing.  It deserves all those cliches.

On October 1, 1987, The Bodeans played at Jake's in Bloomington, Indiana. Jared wanted to know if I was going. Oh, yeah. I wouldn't miss it this time. I'd missed the band's swing through town the previous spring. One of those times when other plans got in the way.

Save four seats if you get there first. I'm coming with friends, Jared shouted over his shoulder. We were hurrying between classes.

Seats saved. One was for him.

August 21, 1988
Dear lord, why did I say yes to this dress? There is no way to explain it away. I've tried. I was young. I was drunk. I was in a hurry because my mother hadn't taken her nerve pill.

Shockingly and contrary to what our friends and family surely thought, but were to polite to mention, I only looked pregnant.

I thought his mullet was hot, loved running my fingers through his curls. I still love running my fingers through them, even if they're on his back. Literally.

Happy Anniversary, MathMan. Despite our lightening fast beginning. Despite ourselves.

I love  you.

51 comments:

  1. What a lovely Anniversary card!
    Jan and I celebrate our Wedding Anniversary today, too.
    36 years.

    Mazeltov!

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    1. Happy Anniversary to you and Jan! 36 years! You're on inspiration.

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  2. Happy Anniversary!

    Timing is everything . . . eventually. :)

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    1. Thank you, Sarah. Eventually worked out for us, didn't it?

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  3. This made me smile :).

    Happy anniversary!

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  4. Love this to pieces. Happy anniversary, keep living that life out loud <3

    BTW, I too love The Bodeans! And your MathMan looks startlingly like Paul Rudd in this wedding pic. You have brilliant tastes :)

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    1. Thanks, Stephanie. The Bodeans! I love them still.

      I am so lucky. MathMan is so handsome and he gets more so with the passage of time.

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  5. Happy Anniversary! Good for you two! :)

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  6. What a beautiful love letter!
    Or, as Paul Simon once put it: Still crazy after all these years :-)

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    Replies
    1. Why, thank you, Francis. That's the perfect song!

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  7. How sweet.

    Let's have no more of this separation and divorce talk if we can possibly help it, ok?

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    1. Thank you, Snad. I think those bad old days are behind us. Way behind us.

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  8. Happy anniversary to the both of you! :)

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  9. Suckers. And hey, it was the 80s, everything looked terrible.

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    1. Sucker? Coming from you, Randal, I'll take that as a tacit approval.

      The 80s were a fashion wreck. But how I miss those shoulder pads....

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  10. Love this. And that is a LOT of 80s fabulousness in that wedding picture. But it's perfect. Happy anniversary!

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    1. Thanks, Wendy! I have to remember the context of that dress. It's definitely of its time.

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  11. Great warming post. And nothing like a man with a mullet. One day you must explain the MathMan name though. Congrats!

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    1. Hey, Cat! MathMan used to blog. Still blogs? He teaches math to high schoolers. His patience with them and me is legendary.

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  12. Congratulations! I offer a toast, which I declare to Chachi every year on our special date: "Another year, and nobody's dead! Rock on!" [clink]

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    1. Ha! Rennratt, sometimes it's very sketchy. Will we make it? I worry about how creative MM could be with a pair of quiet shoes and a pillow. Perhaps that's why I don't nap.

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  13. Aww. Happy Anniversary you guys. I wish you a beautiful future together :).

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  14. There's a dress in the window of a bridal shop up the street that looks just like the one you wore. Halifax isn't in what you'd call the fast lane of the fashion world.

    You made a lovely couple that day and still do all these years later. In fact, you still qualify as 'young marrieds' as far as I'm concerned.

    Happy Anniversary!

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    1. Thank you, susan. It definitely doesn't feel like 24 years have passed. And yet ---

      As for the dress, let's hope some other woman doesn't make that mistake.

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  15. Happy anniversary to you and the infamous MathMan!!

    I have an equally poofy dress that I wore 22 years ago...ugh,what were we thinking?? BTW, my mom had nerve pills too...........she still has them, only I know they are xanex now...who knows what she was taking most of my youth.

    Wishing you both many more years of daily I love yous and fun!!

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    1. Thanks, Anita!

      Our mothers and their nerve pills. I think it might be more fun to use that term than the one I use. "Happy pills."

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  16. What a beautiful tribute. And so...honest. For someone who's taken some time away from writing, you could have fooled me.
    Happy Anniversary! And just for the record? In 1988, that dress was totally kick ass. I have one or two prom dresses to poof up my point.

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    1. Awwww, thanks, Lyra.

      You're helping me feel better about that dress. I know it was awesome in its day, but what I wouldn't give to have chosen something less poofy, more classic in its lines.

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  17. Love actually. Congratulations Lisa & MM. Wonderful couple then and now. And why do any of us chose those dresses!

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    1. Downith - Perhaps we could have been better served by the humiliation of having our wedding dress shopping broadcast like they do today.

      Nah, I still would've gone full poof.

      Thanks for the kind words!

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  18. Happy Anniversary, Lisa and Doug. Hope you have many more years together.

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  19. Happy Anniversary you two. What a wonderful post. Restores my faith somehow. And the dress…who didn't have one like that? The white wedding dress symbolizes purity…and Little Bo Peep was the purest of the pure!

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  20. You guys were so cute! Still are.

    Congratulations to you both! May you be blessed with at least 48 more years.

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  21. Happy Belated Anniversary, you crazy kids! :)

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  22. WTF?!!

    We have the same anniversary!

    We just celebrated our first.

    Congratulations you guys!

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  23. The best things in life take time and effort, plus a lot of wine and cats.

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  24. Happy belated anniversary. You two made a beautiful couple. Explains the beautiful kids.

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  25. Happy Anniversary, you crazy kids.

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  26. Late Haps, Peeps, and many more to you!

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