Bonus Friday OR

Come Next Wednesday, I'm Gonna Wish I Saved This*
(Originally posted on my Facebook. Yes, the two worlds do collide, overlap and swirl together in the most fantastic ways.)

Splotchy started this. Fran continued it. Something about guilt and long-standing tradition, something, something. It's been a bit of blogger thing. Yeah, we're nerds. We embrace it.

I've been tagged, and so by the laws vested in Fran by the State of Confusion and a little broom closet on the second floor of the Vatican, I have to answer all these questions HONESTLY.

As if.

At the end, I'm supposed to choose at least 12 people to be tagged. Plus I'm supposed to tag Fran. I don't know about you, but that seems like an awful lot of effort for something that will result in neither sexual gratification nor cold hard cash. It's not likely that I'll get through all the answers, much less honestly, so the chances that I'll bother tagging anyone are slim to none. If you have the misfortune to stumble upon this and feel the need to participate, please, by all means - feel free. Just leave me out of it.

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Well, what MathMan wants me to say is so inappropriate. The truth is a cheese stick. Not a euphemism.

2. Where was your profile picture taken?
Front Street, Rising Sun, Indiana circa 1983

3. Can you play Guitar Hero?
Not well. But I'm aces at Rock Band. Just don't ask me to play an instrument.

4. Name someone who made you laugh today?
Nick Hornby

5. How late did you stay up last night and why?
11ish. I was watching reruns of Britcoms because I am so lame.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you?
In a heartbeat. No - quicker than that.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
Yes. Wow, hadn't thought of that in AGES.

8. Which of your FB friends lives closest to you?
Family? Doug, Sophia, Nate. Non-Family? Kim Wilson and Gail Johnson

9. Do you believe exes can be friends?
Sure, as long as both put away their weapons.

10. How do you feel about Mountain Dew?
On a scale of 1 - 10 with 1 being "I'd rather drink my own urine" and 10 being Wine? Mountain Dew is a solid 5.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
Really hard? As in snot bubbles? About two weeks ago. (Stop looking at me, MathMan.)

12. Who took your profile picture?
I do not remember. My mom?

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?
Does a cat count? (If you aren't a FB friend, you don't know the fun you're missing. I post pussy pictures almost daily.)

14. Was yesterday better than today?
NO. Decidedly NO.

15. Can you live a day without TV?
Yes, but only a day. At the 24 hour plus a second mark, I would turn in to a raving lunatic. How could you tell? Trust me. You'd know.

16. Are you upset about anything?
Define upset.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Yes. But they'd be much better managed with a whip and a chair. And meds. For me.

18. Are you a bad influence?
I suspect there are some who might have thought that at one time. But no. I'm just not that influential, darlin'

19. Night out or night in?
Depends on the company.

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
A pony-tail holder - you should have seen the pouting I did at the gym last night when I forgot one.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
I don't remember.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
You have been poked by Doug Golden on Facebook. Quelle surprise.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
I should say something positive right? Okay. It could be worse. Much worse, actually. Oh, hell, now I feel guilty for whining about things. I hope you're happy now.

24. Do you hate anyone?
Hate? No. Dislike? Oh yeah.

25. If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find?
Treasured items. Dates to remember. An email from an old friend. Ants. A half a stick of chewing gum, that thing you thought you lost, and my secret decoder ring.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
Without a doubt. I am so clean, I squeak when I walk.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
A perfect ass. Not as in has a, but is a....

28. What song is stuck in your head?
Jason Mraz's I'm Yours. And I may have to blow my brains out as a result.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be?
The more money than you can ever spend or give away fairy.

30.Wanna have grandkids by the time your 50?
I really don't care if I'm ever a grandparent. That's up to my kids, not me.

31. What do you have to do tomorrow?
I have to go to the office, pick up MathMan after a basketball game, celebrate his birthday with the kids and maybe get the car back with its new clutch. See - this honesty thing is damn dull.

32. Do you think too much or too little?
I think too much. I was diagnosed with that affliction just today.

33. Do you smile a lot?
Indeed I do. Even when I probably shouldn't. But it beats assault charges.

34. What hour were you born?
Really? Do you think my mother would have remembered or told me that? Please. Now, ask me what time of day MY kids were born (she shot back smugly and with the kind of sanctimony that makes you want to smack her.)

That's it, kids. It's time for me to see what's not changed on some Britcom I've already seen twenty-seven times. Don't envy me, too much. Not everyone can handle this kind of excitement.

(Thanks, Fran. I owe you one.)

Here's the referred to profile pic because yes I do like to remember that I was once slim, cute, tanned and had it all before me.....

Oh what this chick didn't know she didn't know....