30 Day Photography Challenge - Pink

I see you edited my sign.
Mama, it was embarrassing.
Hey, instead of the what I was originally going to put - the god damned door - which, I understand, turns children to dust or something - I chose my next favorite word. Besides, it got your attention, didn't it?
Mama, we cannot have a sign on the laundry room door that says keep this fucking door shut.
I don't see why not. It's my house.
I told you! It's embarrassing!
I'll tell you what's embarrassing - having your friends in a house where they're likely to be bitten by fleas.
They don't get bit! They're gingers. Nothing bites them. Ask them. They'll tell you.
Just keep the door closed. There's clean laundry in there to carry upstairs and I don't want the damn cats on it.

Tomorrow is my birthday. Today, the last day of 45, I'll spend fighting fleas. We've bombed until our eyebrows began falling out, bathed the cats until they're traumatized and we're bloody, I've become genetically fused to the vacuum cleaner and still, I'm walking around in white socks picking up the little monsters and dunking them in glasses of water. And let me tell ya, there's nothing quite so sexy as a chubby chick in short shorts, a yoga top and knee high gym socks. I'm just waiting for TLC to show up with their cameras, y'all.

We've washed all the bedding twice, opened the house for a decent airing and prayed (even though it goes against our nature) for a jolly good cold snap. Freezing would be nice. I'd sit naked in twenty degree weather with my hair wet and twisted into a unicorn horn of flea shampoo if I thought it would rid us of these nasty little buggers.

I'm contemplating setting aside my convictions about no kill shelters and loading the cats into the Corolla and taking them to the Humane Society. Here, kitty, kitty, wanna go for a ride with Mommy?
But they'll put them to sleep!
Are you the one vacuuming eight hours a day?
Yeah, I thought so.

I woke up screaming from a nightmare. Visions of that magnified flea used in commercials danced before me and I clawed at an itch on my leg.

I think we should just move and not take anything.
Okay, now you're being unreasonable. His eyes didn't leave his computer screen.

Fine. Unreasonable I'll be.

For my birthday, I'd like a few thousand dollars, a passport bearing a new identity, a short stay in a posh institution and possibly a lobotomy if it will also do away with my hellacious sweet tooth once and for all.

Or some cough drops from Randal.


Geoffrey goes pink in a way I can truly appreciate.

UPDATED: Summer puts us on hold with cake!

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Here's the good news - I finished the revisions on my novel. I know I've teased some of you with the prospect of being beta readers, but I'm a little afraid that if I keep working on it, I'll never take the next step. So I'm going to go ahead and start querying agents while some of you read it for me.

Following is the first draft of my query so you can determine whether or not you want to read the dang thing. I assure you, it's not going to be everyone's glass of sweet tea. If, after reading this synopsis, you want to read the draft, please let me know. Thank you, youse guys.

Julie Rhodes is typical of her time – a wife, a mother, a woman trying to juggle her family’s needs, her own desires, her faltering marriage, her status as one of the many unemployed Americans looking for work, and the speed at which everything moves in 2010. She knows she’s losing the battle and wishes for something different.

When she wakes up in 1944 England, Julie realizes she should have been more specific.

Sure that she's dreaming because her son has been joking that he's General George S. Patton reincarnated,  Julie quickly learns that her place in history has been reset and she's gotten the do over she wished for. In exchange, she's lost her family, friends and the internet.

A 73k word mainstream novel, History We Don’t Know tells the story of how Julie adjusts to life in wartime England while trying to find a way back home. Told from several points of view, the story also describes how Julie's family adjusts to life without her and how our perceptions of time and love can change in an instant.

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Gee, really? A fed up woman dreaming of something different? Full circle!

What's eating you?