Christine of Red Hat Pottery reminded me in yesterday's comments that today is TMI Thursday. Have mercy. Is there anything new and just a bit too much that I can overshare? I took it to the family. So? Anything?
I asked MathMan, "What should I write about for TMI Thursday?"
He took a bite of his sandwich and chewed thoughtfully. I didn't give him time to respond because I was a little hopped up on adrenaline from hunting the wild groceries earlier in the afternoon. "I could write about that buttplug, I suppose."
He swallowed audibly. "What buttplug?"
"Did I say buttplug?" Damn, I forgot that was supposed to be a surprise.
Thankfully, his phone rang and by the time he was finished with that call, he's forgotten all about it.
Next I asked Sophia. "What should I write about for TMI Thursday?"
"What's TMI Thursday?"
"Too Much Information. "
She's smart that one. "Well, duh, TMI. But what's TMI Thursday?"
"I put up a blog post containing too much information about something personal." I explained to her royal highness.
"You should write about how I'm your favorite. Of course, there's never too much information about that...."
She may be smart, but she's a one-trick pony. Think I'm kidding? Here are but a few of her more recent lines.
"If I could date me, I would."
"I'm the princess, Chloe is a zitty ogre and Nathan is an ugly oaf. Either that or a hunchback...."
"You have one child whom you love and two others...."
"You should have a vote on your blog. See which kid is everybody's favorite."
I declined by suggesting that she might be disappointed with the results. She merely laughed. I keep her around because she knows just how much wine to pour in the glass. Otherwise, we'd just ship her off to the snakepit already.
The Pussies for Peace were no help at all. They were busy holding yet another tiresome strategic planning session. It seems they are unsatisfied with the litter we're supplying. I believe I heard one of them mention doing an RFP. I thought about calling Chloe, but quickly realized that I couldn't possibly bother her with this question. I hate how it sounds over the phone when she rolls her eyes. She doesn't say so, but I suspect she thinks this entire blog is TMI. I just imagine her asking "Why should Thursday be any different?" Skip it. There's one more person I can ask....
So I finally approached Nate with my request.
The consummate teen, he answered me visually. He'd just gotten his baseball season buzz cut and was modeling how he'll look some day when there's more hair on his back than on his head. He's quite cold-blooded about the fact that by his late twenties, he'll be practically bald. Like my brother, Nate plans to just shave his head and be done with it. He's sure he can be a bald sexy beast. As for the rest of his body, well, I'm his mother. I don't think it's appropriate to talk to him about manscaping downtown....
Heh. I would bore everyone with the full story of how I caused 1000+ posts with a simple question, but it turns out that all the posts on that day are lost (and Google's advanced search is denying the existence of both myself and the thread).
ReplyDeleteHey, ya wanna hear about my nail polish flaking patterns?
Thought not.
Hold onto the hope that the kids will become responsible adults. Someday. ;-)
And happy Purim! (weekend, but who knows when I'll turn up?)
Good job. You completely ruined the next installment of TMI Thursday since we know all about the buttplug.
ReplyDeleteIs Sophia 15, caramel-brown and slightly over 100lbs? 'Cuz she sounds like somebody I know.
ReplyDeleteOh, and EW, Nate!
G
awwwww-- all your kids look like they just stepped out of an Italian Renaissance painting....
ReplyDeleteglad I inspired you to write something of value today.
Manscaping is ALWAYS a good TMIT.
ReplyDeleteOne day as I walked back into an office I shared my cube-mate was just finishing a phone call saying 'Yes, I'll bring him in for the full body wax at 4pm'. In order to alleviate the symptoms of my eyebrows having migrated to my hairline she explained her 17 year old son had to be completely free of body hair to join the high school wrestling team. I still think that's weird.
ReplyDeletedamnit had something witty to say but my wife distracted me.
ReplyDeletebut hey lots of hair worked for george the animal steele he always got the girl
of course he stole and carried her off but you know whatever
--clevelandPoet
That picture is hilarious! Definitely TMI.
ReplyDeleteThere you go. Better than the butt plug. Talking about your son man-scaping downtown.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, at first glance it did look like he had hair on his shoulders.
Oh, my fecking god, my belly hurts from laughing...did Nate see the post??!!
ReplyDeleteAnd don't tell Sophia but she's my favorite. ;-)
That was great - love the pic of Nate with his back hair!
ReplyDeleteLisa, I am home...
ReplyDeleteLisa, surely you know now that the way to control, silence, and embarrass your children (especially the one who thinks she's special) is to talk about your sex life on the blog. And then tell your kids to check it.
ReplyDeleteTMI? Oh I think so....
:)
I'm tempted, but I won't ask...
ReplyDelete"You should have a vote on your blog. See which kid is everybody's favorite."
ReplyDeleteThat was brutally hilarious.
Hi Lisa
ReplyDeleteI'm rushing through to remind you that I've moved Politics Plus to http://www.politicsplus.org/blog and thank you veo being among the first to visit.
You're in the new blogroll there. Would you please update me in yours?
That is so terrifying, the final image. Which I will have to take to my sleep.
ReplyDeleteBut honestly, the first thing would have probably been more horrible in my dreams...
;)
You had me at buttplug.
ReplyDeletePS. I moved the comment link for you.
ReplyDelete